ROMAN CATHOLIC WOMEN PRIESTS & WHEN I AM POPE DREAM MANIFESTO: A STORY IN TWO CHAPTERS; LINDA MARY MONTANO 2013
CHAPTER ONE: ROMAN CATHOLIC WOMEN PRIESTS: A REAL DREAM
Once upon a time there were Catholic women who wanted to be priests. This is a real live story and a true fairy tale so listen closely. In 2002, seven of these CATHOLIC WOMEN who wanted to be priests were actually ordained in Germany by a real live Bishop in good standing with the Catholic church and a Bishop quote " in full apostolic succession". end quote. That means this bishop was the real thing and was doing something real, real scary, something the Pope and Vatican didn't like at all. Bad bad bad bad bad.
The Womenpriests and the Bishops and male priest who sponsored them got in real big big trouble and in 2007 the Vatican said quote " They would excommunicate anyone who attempts to confer a sacred order on a woman and excommunicate the woman who attempts to receive a sacred order".endquote
Guess what? That means that Bishops who ordained women who wanted to be Catholic priests and women who became priests were kicked out of the church. Boooooo Hooooooooooo this isn't fair, this isn't good, this is terrible!!
It is very dangerous to be a Catholic Womanpriest. Why do they do this to themselves? They want equality, they want to be included, they want justice, they want equality, they want to serve the people in ministry, they want to be priests and even maybe Popes some day like POPE JOAN was long ago. They feel called by the HOLY SPIRIT and they feel theologically qualified. What more do the men in the Catholic church want?
Some really smart and open minded Catholic Bishops have notorized documents when they ordained these women and placed films and photos with a NOTORY PUBLIC. Wow what brave and radical and correct and right thinking men they are. Thank you, thank you, thank you cool Bishops! And they are making it all legal but alas it isn't theologically legal.
And guess what, these Catholic Womenpriests will allow married women, heterosexual women, homosexual women, grandmothers, divorced women and women who have had marriage annulments to be Womenpriests!! How radical and inclusive is this! Brava brava and applause to all of you.
But oh no, the Vatican says in canon law number 1024 quote "A baptized man alone receives sacred ordination validly". End quote.
Opps, this is not good news for sure. And then they said, Quote "The ordination of a woman to the priesthood, even if conducted by a Catholic bishop in good standing, is without sacramental effect." End Quote
Boo hoo boo hoo. but i'm not going to cry for long because now I say yippee hooray because nothing is stopping these women and there are presently in 2013, over 145 ordained CATHOLIC WOMENPRIESTS who feel called to give service and help and miinistry to all in a new, caring, compassionate and loving way.
Join with me in saying yipppppee brava brava brava you brave women of love.
Now we will move to CHAPTER 2 to read a manifesto I have written which talks about things I will do when I am POPE. I know my hubris and arrogance is outstanding and incorrect but hey, I wanted to be a WOMANPRIEST once and became an artist instead and didn't get to do that so I became an artist instead and now i'm thinking, why not aim high and visualize becoming a woman Pope? Pope Joan did and so can I.
Listen closely to my Manifesto:
A NIGHT DREAM: THE WOMAN POPE MANIFESTO TITLED: WHEN I AM POPE THIS WILL HAPPEN
BY LINDA MARY MONTANO , 2013
1. ALL OF MY SISTER WOMENPRIESTS & NUNS WILL RECEIVE PAY, BENEFITS, VACATIONS AND TITLES EQUAL TO ALL MALE CLERGY.
2. CHOSEN AND WISE WOMEN PRIESTS AND MALE CLERGY ALONG WITH LAY THEOLOGIANS AND WISE ELDERS WILL HELP WRITE ECCLESIATICAL ENCYCLICALS.
3. THE "DEPOSIT OF FAITH", CANON LAWS AND SUPPOSEDLY INFALLIBLE RULES AND REGULATIONS OF THE CATHOLIC CHURCH WILL BE ADJUSTED AND REWRITTEN ACCORDING TO THE TIME, PLACE AND NEEDS OF CURRENT SITUATIONS AND WILL NOT BE RIGIDLY BELIEVED TO BE INFALLIBILE OR UNCHANGEABLE.
4. CONTRACEPTION WILL BE A CHOSEN OPTION AND NOT BE JUDGED TO BE A MORTAL SIN.
5. PRE-MARITAL SEX WILL BE ALLOWED AS NATURAL AND NOT BE JUDGED TO BE A MORTAL SIN.
6. MARRIED SEX WILL BE ALLOWED TO BE PRACTICED BOTH FOR PLEASURE AND FOR PROCREATION. SEX FOR PLEASURE WILL BE DEEMED NATURAL.
7. GAY RIGHTS/MARRIAGE WILL BE JUDGED TO BE NATURAL AND ALLOWED.
8. EQUAL VOTING POWER WILL BE GIVEN TO WOMEN FOR ALL ASPECTS OF CHURCH FUNCTIONING.
9. THERE WILL BE MARRIED CLERGY. THAT IS: WOMEN CLERGY WILL BE ALLOWED TO BE MARRIED WITH OTHER WOMEN OR MEN. AND MEN CLERGY WILL BE ALLOWED TO BE MARRIED TO OTHER WOMEN OR MEN.
10. CELIBATE CLERGY WILL BE OPTIONAL IF CELIBACY IS CHOSEN BY THE INDIVIDUAL. THIS CAN CHANGE AS THE NEEDS OF THE FEMALE AND MALE PRIESTS CHANGE.
11. MEDITATION MUST BE PRACTICED BY ALL CATHOLICS. CATHOLICS FROM ASIA WILL TEACH THEIR MEDITATION METHODS IN EVERY PARISH.
12. MEDITATION WILL BE EXPECTED OF ALL CLERGY AS WELL AS A BODY PRACTICE SUCH AS YOGA, JUDO, DANCING, RUNNING ETC. AND MY CLERGY WILL ALSO HAVE A PRIVATE ART PRACTICE SUCH AS SINGING, WRITING, ACTING ETC.
13. CLERGY CAN RETIRE WHEN NEEDED.
14. SEXUAL INFORMATION AND THE ART OF AUTHENTIC, TRANSPARENT NATURALNESS WILL BE DISCUSSED IN SEMINARY COURSES. SEX THERAPISTS WILL EXPLAIN THE PHYSIOLOGY AND PSYCHOLOGY OF SEX WHILE THE SEMINARIANS ARE IN TRAINING TO BE PRIESTS. THIS TRAINING WILL BE RENEWED EVERY 7 YEARS.
15. THERAPEUTIC MASSAGE WILL BE PRESCRIBED MONTHYLY FOR EACH PRIEST.
16. THE POPE, BISHOPS , ARCHBISHOPS, CARDINALS, MONSIGNORS AND PRIESTS WILL MEET WITH ALL SEXUAL ABUSE SURVIVORS EVERY YEAR FOR A 7 DAY HEALING CEREMONY. AT THESE MEETINGS, EACH SURVIVOR TELLS THE STORY OF THEIR ABUSE, YEAR AFTER YEAR AFTER YEAR. FINANCIAL PAYMENT WILL BE GIVEN FOR THERAPY FOR ALL SURVIVORS.
17. PARISH FINANCES WILL BE OVERSEEN BY A COMMITTEE OF 20 PARISHONERS ON A WEEKLY BASIS.
18. MASTURBATION WILL BE ALLOWED AND NOT JUDGED TO BE A MORTAL SIN BUT A HEALING THERAPY.
19. PARISH MONEY WILL BE GIVEN TO THE RIGHT CAUSES IN THE RIGHT AMOUNTS, TRANSPARENTLY.
20. WOMEN AND MALE SEMINARIANS WILL SPEND ONE WEEK OBSERVING CHILDBIRTH AT A BIRTHING CENTER, ONE WEEK OBSERVING EMBALMING IN A MORGUE, ONE WEEK WORKING AT A MCDONALDS AND ONE WEEK OBSERVING A COUNSELING SESSION OF A CLERGY ABUSE SURVIVOR WHO IS SUFFERING FROM PTSD.
21. IN EVERY PARISH OR COMMUNITY THERE WILL BE HOMES OF HOSPITALITY FOR UNWANTED NEWBORNS AND ELDERS. THESE TWO POPULATIONS WILL LIVE INTERDEPENDENTLY.
22. CHARISMATICS FROM INDIA, THE PHILIPINES AND BRAZIL WILL BE HOUSED IN EVERY PARISH
COMMUNITY AND WILL BE AVAILABLE FOR TEACHING AND HEALINGS ON A DAILY BASIS.
23. THE DIVINE FEMININE, FEMALE MYSTICS AND FEMALE DOCTORS OF THE CHURCH WILL BE TAUGHT IN EVERY PARISH COMMUNITY.
24. EVERY PARISH COMMUNITY WILL CREATE SUSTAINABLE ORGANIC VEGETABLE AND ANIMAL FARMS FOR MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY CHALLENGED MEMBERS OF THE COMMUNITY SO THAT THEY CAN HAVE PROXIMITY TO NATURE AND HEALING.
25. FEMALE AND MALE CLERGY WILL FOCUS ON THE MYSTICAL NOT THE MONETARY BECAUSE THEY WILL HAVE ASSIANTANTS WHO WILL GUARANTEE ACCOUNTABILTY IN THE PARISHES WITH OVERSEERERS IN ALL ASPECTS OF THE CHURCH . THAT IS, ALL COMMITTEE AND CHURCH MEETINGS WILL HAVE REPRESENTATIVES FROM THE YOUNGEST TO ELDERS WITH EACH HAVING EQUAL TIME TO GIVE INPUT AND CORRECTION.
26. ALL FEMALE AND MALE CLERGY WHO WILL HAVE PUBLIC POSITIONS WILL BE VERSED IN SOCIAL ACCOUNTABILITY SKILLS SO THEY CAN FEEL A FREEDOM OF INTERCHANGE AND A HUMILITY IN INTERACTIONS AND NOT BE FEARED. TO BE A FUNCTIONING CLERGY IN MY PARISHES, ALL CLERGY WILL HAVE APPROPRIATE PSYCHOLOGICAL THERAPY.
27. CLERGY WILL BE BE EVALUATED ON INNER WARMTH AND OUTER COMPASSION AND IF THEY ARENT MANIFESTING POSITIVE HEALING INNER JOY, THEY WILL BE ASKED TO RETIRE OR GO ON RETREAT FOR 3 YEARS.
28.THE LAITY WILL BE ABLE TO CHOOSE TO GO TO CONFESSION WITH EACH OTHER IF THEY WISH OR CAN CHOOSE TO CONFESS WITH CLERGY. THE CHOICE IS GIVEN TO THE LAITY, NOT THE CHURCH.
29. IF THE CHURCH IS IN A COUNTRY OR A COMPROMISED SITUATION WHERE THERE IS NOT A FUNCTIONING CLERGY, CATHOLIC LAITY WILL BE ABLE TO ADMINISTER THE SACRAMENTS OF CONFESSION, BAPTISM AND THE SACRAMENT OF THE SICK.
30. TRANSUBSTANTIATION WILL BE THE FOCUS OF EVERY MASS AND 7 MINUTES WILL BE MANDATORY FOR THE TIME WHEN THE BREAD AND WINE ARE "RAISED UP" DURING MASS SO THAT THIS MIRACLE CAN BE FELT AND EXPERIENCED AND MEDITATED ON BY ALL PRESENT, ESPECIALLY THE OFFICIANT.
31. MY CLERGY WILL MEET WITH POLITICAL LEADERS ONLY IF THERE ARE NON VIOLENT COMMUNICATION FACILITATORS, THERAPISTS AND ACCUPUNCURISTS ATTENDING AND PARTICIPATING BY KEEPING EVERYONE EMOTIONALLY CENTERED AND RATIONAL AND KIND CONCERNING DECISIONS ABOUT JUSTICE, LIBERATION THEOLOGY AND THE POOR.
32. END OF LIFE ISSUES WILL BE A CASE BY CASE, ETHICAL AND HUMANE FAMILY AND MEDICAL AND INDIVIDUAL CHOICE NOT A FEARED CLERICAL RULE OR REGUALTION AS TO THE RIGHT WAY TO DIE.
33. MASS WILL BE A CELEBRATION OF LIFE WITH OPTIONS TO ATTEND THE CHURCH OF YOUR AESTHETIC CHOICE: THAT IS PARISHONERS MAY CELEBRATE IN STRICTLY NON-EXPRESSIVE, LATINITE RITUALIZED WAYS OR IN AN EXPRESSIVE AND THEOLOGICALLY ECSTATIC CHARISMATIC MANNER.
34. TEACHERS OF EASTERN THEOLOGIES IINCLUDING HINDU, ZEN BUDDHIST, JAIN AND TIBETAN WILL BE INCLUDED IN ALL TRAINING PROGRAMS FOR CATHOLIC CLERGY.
35. EACH CLERGY MEMBER WILL HAVE TO SPEND 3 YEARS IN A THIRD WORLD COUNTRY GIVING MEDICAL AND ECOLOGICAL ASSISTANCE TO THE PEOPLE OF THAT COUNTRY BEFORE SERVING IN A NON-THIRD WORLD PARISH. WHILE THERE, THEY WILL KEEP THEIR RELIGIOUS BELIEFS PRIVATE AND THEIR WORSHIP PERSONAL.
36. WOMEN POPES WILL HOLD UP THEIR BIRTH CHILDREN TO CO-BLESS THEIR PARISHONERS FROM THE BALCONY OF ST PETERS.
37. ST MARY MAGDALEN, BRING WISDOM AND COMPASSION TO THE HEARTS, MINDS AND SPIRITS OF ALL FEMALE AND MALE CATHOLIC CLERGY. AMEN