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Wednesday, May 9, 2012

LINDA MARY MONTANO'S RANT-A-RAMA

RANT-A-RAMA

DO YOU NEED TO RANT AND DONT WANT TO WASTE YOUR TIME/ENERGY/MENTAL PEACE/REPUTATION/MEDITATED EQUILIBRIUM/DISCIPLINE/AURA OF SWEETNESS DOING SO?

  IF SO............SEND ME YOUR ISSUE/ISSUES AND :

1. I WILL DESIGN AN OBJECT THAT WILL APPEAR TO HAVE BEEN MADE BY AN UNHAPPY CAMPER WHICH I THEN SEND TO YOU OR

2. I WILL COMPOSE AN OVER THE TOP RANT-FILLED LETTER WHICH YOU CAN SEND: TO A PERSON TO A COUNTRY TO A MEDICAL PERSON/PLACE TO A LOBBYIST TO YOUR CONTRACTOR TO A PROPONENT OF FRACKING TO AN EDITOR OF ANY PAPER ANYWHERE TO A BOOK PUBLISHER TO A GALLERY OWNER TO A BISHOP ETC.

3. I ALSO DESIGN RESPONSES FOR YOUR NEED TO SEND A RANTING EMAIL

4.  I MAKE HYSTERICALLY GENERATED CELLPHONE CALLS IF YOU ARE SHY TO DO SO

5. I COMPOSE TEXTS AND CAN EMAIL THEM TO YOU

6. I DESIGN T-SHIRTS WITH YOUR RANT-MESSAGE ON IT IF YOU ARE NOT ABLE TO SPEAK UP AT THE GYM AND

7. I ALSO ADVISE YOU OF OTHER WAYS THAT I CAN HELP YOU GET THINGS RANTED ABOUT, OFF YOUR CHEST, OUT OF YOUR LEFT BRAIN AND INTO THE REALM OF YOUR TRUTH

I HAVE BEEN KNOWN TO PRODUCE TOTALLY ARCANE EXERCISES OF DRIBBLED RAGE THAT WILL FIT ANY OCCASION.

WHAT IS THE RESULT?

 YOU AND I BOTH BENEFIT: YOU GET TO FEEL BETTER AND I GET TO EXERCISE MY RANT-MUSCLES WHICH INCREASE EXPODENTIALLY AS I AGE.

TO DISCUSS:

CALL 1-7*5-%%3-#2@#@%8

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