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LINDA AND TOBE MAKE A DEATH TAPE

LINDA AND TOBE MAKE A DEATH TAPE

LINDA AND TOBE MAKE A DEATH TAPE

LINDA: Tobe, I need to make a tape about death and need it by next week at  3pm Wednesday. Is that OK? I cant tell you where I will show it because that is not for public knowledge.

TOBE: Lordy, Linda, I do hope you make a tape about death but I thought you were finished making tapes.

LINDA: I know it is  very disturbing to investigate this but death terrifies me and I need to talk to you about it. It will be  only a 3 minute tape, ok?

TOBE: I know that. OK as long as it is  under 3 minutes I will make it.  Let me do some research. Wikipedia says that death is the cessation of all biological functions that sustain a living organism. Phenomena which commonly bring about death include biological aging (senescence), predation, malnutrition, disease, suicide, homicide, starvation, dehydration, and accidents or trauma resulting in terminal injury.[1] Bodies of living organisms begin to decompose shortly after death.

LINDA:  I know that Tobe. Our friend Wikipedia also says that death – particularly the death of humans – has commonly been considered a sad or unpleasant occasion, due to the affection for the being that has died and the termination of social and familial bonds with the deceased. Other concerns include fear of death, necrophobia, anxiety, sorrow, grief, emotional pain, depression, sympathy, compassion, solitude, or saudade. What is saudade Tobe? Oh well, let me continue. Many cultures and religions have the idea of an afterlife, and also hold the idea of reward or judgement and punishment for past sin.

TOBE: I know that.  Oh Linda, how many minutes is this by now??? You promised only 3 minutes. I thought you retired? Do we have to make this tape? Please I beg you let’s not. Help!!! Help!!!!!!!!! Help.

LINDA: I know Tobe. This wont be too long. Have you ever heard of senescence? I think I have it Tobe because I’m in my late 70’s. Let me tell you about it:

Senescence refers to a scenario when a living being is able to survive all calamities, but eventually dies due to causes relating to old age. Animal and plant cells normally reproduce and function during the whole period of natural existence, but the aging process derives from deterioration of cellular activity and ruination of regular functioning . I know I look fabulous and not old at  all. Maybe I wont die Tobe, what do you think?

TOBE: It’s almost up. Your time that is. But here is some more information. Wikipedia says that

Signs of death or strong indications that someone is no longer alive are:

LINDA: Tobe, I’m still breathing, maybe I am still alive? DO I look alive to you????I don’t think I have

  • Livor mortis, a settling of the blood in the lower (dependent) portion of the body  OR
  • Algor mortis, the reduction in body temperature following death. This is generally a steady decline until matching ambient temperature  OR
  • Rigor mortis, the limbs of the corpse become stiff (Latin rigor) and difficult to move or manipulate   OR
  • Decomposition, the reduction into simpler forms of matter, accompanied by a strong, unpleasant odor.

TOBE: I know that. You’re still alive and so am I. Yayyyyyy. Time is up. Let’s go get a pizza , OK? I can have this to you by Tuesday. You promise me, this is truly our last tape, right???

LINDA: I know that Tobe.  Last tape.  YAYYYYYYYYYYYYY. Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy
WE ARE ALIVE OH YES WE ARE
WE’RE WELL ENOUGH TO DRIVE OUR CARS
MOW OUR LAWNS AND WASH OUR FEET
OH LIFE OH LIFE YOU’RE SUCH A TREAT ,
SUCH A TREAT OH SUCH A TREAT, SUCH A TREAT, such a treat, such a treat.
Linda Mary Montano 2017, June